So Friday we had our follow up appointment to the D&C. It was a little emotionally tolling, they put us in the same room we were in when we found out we were losing this pregnancy. The doctor tried to make it a quick check up, but I wanted testing done. So my poor doctor got stuck dealing with me for an extra half an hour. But I’m so glad I did that.
I am terrified of doctors and authority figures in the same way. What they say must be so true, and I’m too dumb to know. Do they try to make me feel that way? Hell no, but I have issues. So I tend to be meek around doctors. If they don’t think something is necessary, I usually go with it. I didn’t on Friday though.
Instead I advocated for myself. I showed that I had done my research. I was meek, don’t get me wrong, but I was persistent. The fact is, it is fucking rare to lose two consecutive pregnancies within the short time we did. It is rare. While there is a 50% chance that they would remain unexplained, there was a 50% chance we could prevent a third miscarriage. Which to be honest, I have no idea if I would survive the third one.
So I agreed that any unproven testing was worthless, but I really wanted to check the proven things. I wanted to look at my thyroid, blood clotting disorders, and chromosomes. I knew that some of those tests were expensive. I know that it would require blood draws that would put me into a panic attack. But fuck it all, I wanted to know if we could prevent this shit.
So they took all that blood in the picture above. Yep, that is all my fucking blood pulled from my left hand. And I didn’t even fucking cry. Bow to my badass self, y’all. I survived that fucking terrifying shit.
Monday we got some results back. My thyroid levels were high, and my antibodies were super high! What does this mean? I’m not completely sure yet. However digging through internet articles and research journals, it might be the cause we have been looking for. I am waiting to hear from an endocrinologist office so we can make an appointment. So hopefully we can find out official doctor approved things here in the next month.
So if there is one lesson I will impart on you all, it is this: Advocate for yourselves! If something feels wrong/off/a wee bit odd, then advocate for yourself. Ask for the tests you think might give you answers. Don’t lose more than you have to.